Some of the podcasts that receive the most feedback are those that delve into complex relationships. It might seem that if a relationship is challenging or even painful, losing a loved one within that dynamic wouldn't be as difficult or would provide a measure of relief. However, more often than not, that assumption doesn't hold true. In fact, the loss of a loved one within a difficult relationship can be even harder to navigate than when someone is in a typical relationship. Shira had complicated relationships with much of her family. But her father was always her supporter and cheerleader. The news of his illness was completely devastating for her, and it made the dynamics with her siblings more complicated than ever. Sometimes she felt as if they made decisions about her father’s treatment just to spite her. It was so hard and so hurtful. After his petirah she sat shivah by herself, without her family.  Now she holds onto the memories of the special moments she had with her father – the one thing that no one can take away from her. Grief hurts. But as crazy as it sounds, my hope is that the only kind of grief anyone should ever experience is grief from losing someone within a normal, beautiful relationship. https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

 Mrs. Feige Steinmetz   Mother of Dovi Steinmetz, who perished in the Meron tragedy Lag Ba’Omer taf shin peh aleph (2021) is seared into our collective Jewish memory. It was on that day that a stampede took place in Meron, resulting in death and injury for many people. At first it seemed that Dovi was safe. Then his parents were unsure. And then it was confirmed: Dovi had been killed in Meron.  How does a mother handle such news? Mrs. Steinmetz was in shock. It made no sense. How could it be?  The Steinmetzes rushed to get to Eretz Yisrael. But in Ben Gurion airport the security personnel gave them a hard time, still particular about Covid restrictions. Come listen to this strong woman. Hear her pain and her chizzuk. Hear the realness in her words and about her decision to be okay despite not being okay. Because after losing a child, a mother will never be the same.https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

Lessons from the Past    Mrs. Chaya Ginzberg BYA Teacher Rivky, Mrs. Ginzberg’s daughter, was a young mother of four children when she was niftar.  On this podcast, Mrs. Ginzberg shares how although each family member struggled with their pain in their own way, the family held onto each other for dear life. With acceptance and faith there were no family politics. The relationship with her son-in-law, grandchildren and her son-in-law’s new wife remained peaceful and respectful.  And then tragedy struck again when her husband was niftar. But Mrs. Ginzberg shares that she has role models and chinuch from her past to guide her through her challenges. She says, “Aleph is for emunah and beis is for bitachon. My ancestors lost their entire families in the war, but they passed down a legacy of positivity.” This podcast is shorter than most, but it is packed with inspiration. I think you’ll enjoy listening and gain a lot! https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

Rabbi Yitzchok Rubin Rav of Adas Aish Kodesh in Manchester England She was Rebbetzin Rubin, but she was known as Chaiky. She had a way with people. Everyone who knew her felt loved and embraced by her – because she loved life, and she loved the people in her life. Whether it was her congregants or the ladies from the exercise class she gave, they all felt how deeply she cared. Chaiky was a powerhouse of a person. She was always on the go, yet somehow had time for everyone.  She was on the phone with her grandson Pinny one day, but she needed to leave to be on time for her exercise class. She handed the phone to her husband and told him, “Here, you talk to Pinny.” And then she died. Her husband, a choshuve rav and mechanech, introduces himself as Chaiky’s husband. Because to him that is who he is. He is everything because of his wife. It is four years now since her petirah.  He says, “The searing pain has diminished somewhat, but it hasn’t disappeared. I live with it always.” Yet through his pain he talks about accepting difficult nisyonos.  https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

Mrs. Robin Meyerson, West Coast Director of NASCK (National Association of Chevrah Kadisha)Mrs. Robin Meyerson has a passion, and she passionately shares it. That passion is to help prevent cremation. She exhorts her listeners: “As Jews, we are all one, so when one Jew is being cremated, it affects all of us. We must stop this from happening.” She repeats so many times that she is available 24/6 to help save a Jew from being cremated.  Robin laments that there are so many misconceptions about cremation versus burial. Many people think cremation is cheaper or better for the environment. One person shared that she was scared to be buried because she doesn’t like bugs! Robin clearly explains the fallacy of such thinking. She personally gets involved and does whatever she can to bring fellow Jews to proper kevurah.  What does this have to do with you? There are many frum people who have non-frum relatives. And that is why this podcast is so important.  Robin’s message is aimed at the frum community. Do you have a non-frum relative, neighbor or friend? Talk to them about kevuras Yisrael now, when they are still living; once they have passed on, their post-death plans will be very difficult to change.  Are you scared to touch upon this topic or unsure about how to broach it? Robin shares her cell number twice on this podcast. She is waiting to support you through this vital conversation. https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

Mrs. Zissy Muller She woke up one night and heard heavy rain outside her window. In a state of panic, she called her father and asked, “Where are the shovels?  It’s raining. My child is cold. We must go dig him out of his grave.” Meet Zissy Muller. No, she isn’t crazy. She is a mother who lost her child.  When her beloved son died completely unexpectedly, she was thrust into a brand-new world of pain that was so intense, it felt as if she was being burned by a blazing flame.  Continuing with life seemed so impossible – and also, so wrong. How could she go on when her child would never grow up? Although she couldn’t dig her son out of his grave, she dug and dug internally to get to a place of acceptance and serenity. She wanted to be a happy person despite her pain. Zissy says it as it is. She offers a wealth of guidance in how to grow from pain. And yes, her heart still feels the burning pain at times; never is there a day that she doesn’t think about her son. But the fire has died down to flickering sparks, which flare up on occasion. This podcast offers chizzuk to those that lost a child and deep insight into what parents might experience after losing a child. Even many years after the loss.https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

Don’t Explain Because There is No Explanation  Rabbi Sruli Fried, MSW Director of Chai Lifeline NJ/ PA When a young child (in the NJ/PA) region has just been diagnosed, is on his deathbed or has just been niftar, Rabbi Fried is there. He sits with the family, and he cries with the family. His sensitivity hasn’t waned over time. Likely it has deepened.  Over the years, parents have shared with Rabbi Fried various things that can be helpful after losing a child and other things that can be hurtful. With true compassion and understanding he relays what he has learned. I could have easily spoken to Rabbi Fried for a few more hours, but I told him I wouldn’t take more than an hour of his time. I had to keep my word – to him and to my listeners.  I wonder if the listeners would have stayed on for the three hours I wished we could have spoken for.   https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

Mrs. Deenie Yurkansky If you listen to Mrs. Yurkansky, you may be blown away. I know I was. Her son Shaul was a most beloved son and friend. He was gentle and kind, and his mother misses him. It doesn’t matter how many years have gone by. A mother’s heart will never stop aching for her child. But her connection to him is still strong, and she looks for signals from him.  Before he died, he said, “Ma, don’t forget about me 24/7.” When I asked her to come onto the podcast, she said, “Of course! It will be me giving over Shaul’s legacy, and Shaul helping me give it over.” Listen as she keeps his legacy alive with her beautiful, heartfelt words. They give her chizzuk while she gives chizzuk to others. https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

Rabbi Shmuel Kohn, Therapist and Director of Shloimy’s Club When people go through a tough nisayon, it isn’t uncommon to feel angry at Hashem. A person might shut down or feel numb, and they may even feel unable to daven. This can cause a lot of inner turmoil. Where is my emunah? Do I not believe in Hashem? From the time we are young we are taught that everything that happens is from Hashem, so if I’m thinking this way, I must be a terrible person. Or not. You may just be a person who went through a very painful experience. As humans we might feel these emotions and condemn ourselves when we do.  Rabbi Kohn so clearly explains how feeling anger and pain or asking questions of Hashem doesn’t mean you don’t believe. There is room for both.  You are not an apikores just because you have these questions.  Rabbi Kohn explores this concept so beautifully from therapeutic and hashkafic perspectives. Come listen and gain clarity and insight.   https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/

Ask anyone who knows me from my growing-up days. Back then, they would have laughed at the prospect of me hosting a podcast. It just wasn’t my type. But here I am, doing just that – and I get regular calls in response.  People tell me, “Thank you so much. I love your podcast. I am finding it so helpful.” I feel gratified that Hashem has given me the opportunity to do this. Loss is so painful, and if I can help even a small fraction of those in pain, then I am grateful. Never would I have imagined the vast array of people I have hosted so far. There are those that share their own personal stories of loss, and then there are the rabbis and therapists and founders of important initiatives. It is so rewarding to see that more and more people are listening. That keeps me going. Now that it’s over a year since we’ve begun, I decided it was time to review. This isn’t a podcast with one person talking, but rather, snippets from many guests who came on over the past year, sharing their experience or chizzuk. After you listen, you might just feel like listening to them all.   https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-me-a-book-for-teens-who-have-lost-a-parent/ https://www.chevrahlomdeimishnah.org/product/i-wish-someone-would-have-told-my-friends/